5 Golden Rules

     I have tried every strategy under the sun to lose weight. Most of the things I tried were really unhealthy, unsavory, and ineffective. I have a lot to say about all of my crash diets and extreme weight loss schemes, but today I am sharing what I consider to be the 5 core strategies that lead to long term health. This is the foundation of my healthy lifestyle.

     For the record, I am not a doctor. If you find a suggestion questionable, don't use it. This content is meant to be inspirational. I have no professional or educational credentials. All my information is based on life experience, lots of reading, and making shit up. Experiment with these tips at your own risk.

     After returning from my honeymoon in June of 2012 twenty pounds heavier and just as far as ever from my goal weight, I took a step back and analyzed my history of dieting. Twice before I had had semi-successful weight loss. When I was 17 I lost over 40 lbs and when I was 21 I lost 65 pounds. Luckily for me, I have been a tenacious journaler my whole life. I went into my archives and read all about what I was doing and eating, and how I was feeling (and who I dated, and crappy poetry, and ugly gossip, and so much teenage angst). Based on this empirical data, I came up with my plan.

1. Write it Down
     Write down everything you put in your mouth, all the daily activity you do, your weekly weigh in results, how you feel, who you're dating, crappy poetry, etc. It is quintessential (essential to the 5th power). All of the major diet programs have a food journal policy, I.E. Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers, L.A. Weight Loss. Bob and Jillian make The Biggest Loser contestants write down what they eat and track calories burned with a body bug. The great Tony Horton of P90X fame encourages his followers to record their number of reps done, weight used, and take frequent pictures of their half naked flexing bodies. It is all about staying accountable to yourself, being aware of your habits, and tracking your progress.

2. Drink Water
     Or Die. I aim to drink 3 Liters of water a day. I worked with a woman who lost 20 lbs just by cutting out soda and replacing it with water. She said she played video games for a few hours each day and would swig from a gallon of water while she loafed. Is that not the easiest sounding life change you've ever heard of? I like to drink water at work. A dear friend's mother once gave me a precious pearl of wisdom. She said there is nothing better than getting paid to use the restroom. So drink up while you are watching the clock, and then pee frequently on the company's dime.

3. Exercise
     Hate to break it to you, but you have to exercise. If you diet and don't work-out you can still lose weight, but you will still look fat. Exercising will make you look good, which is the most valuable part of losing weight. You don't have to go full ham right away. Do what you can. Do what you like. Do it with a buddy. I'll tell you what I do when I don't feel like working out. I put my tennis shoes on. That is really half the battle. Once your tennis shoes are on, your feet will figure you might as well go for a walk. It also helps to own lots of really cute work-out outfits. There are days that the only reason I shave is so I can wear a cute outfit to the gym. Plus there are so many things to be self conscious about when you are working out in front of people; your clothes shouldn't be one of them. I am getting off topic. The point is you need to move. My standard is an hour a day 5 days a week.

4. Cook 
     Eating out is the devil. The food you get at a restaurant is full of added sugar, sodium, and other garbage. When I eat at home, I eat whatever I want. If i can cook it or bake it, I can eat it. It is really important to note that you have to make it from scratch and still follow recommended serving sizes. Buying a Stouffer's Lasagna is the same thing as eating out, and eating a whole homemade lasagna is obviously not what I mean. Plus eating out is crazy expensive. This chick from choir had a mantra for this, "Save money, save calories". Look up recipes, get creative, use lots of spices, and eat what you want. I do try to observe a few other dining principles, but the core of my diet is that I eat at home.

5. Stay Motivated
     Don't give up. Positive thinking is just as much a part of this as diet and exercise. Why are you trying to lose weight? Think about that. I'm vain, so I did it to be really really ridiculously good looking. Reward yourself for each and every accomplishment. I normally treat myself to beauty treatments, clothes, or alcohol. Look at things that inspire you. Read weight-loss memoirs, watch fit t.v., make a thinspiration board on pinterest. Most importantly, when you have a set back, start over right away. You have the opportunity to change your behavior each second. Don't say I'll be good tomorrow, say I'm gonna wipe the oreo crumbs off my shirt and make the rest of this day good.